Tuesday, June 12, 2012

How to get your mother-in- law to like you


I've been married for twenty five years now. It hasn't been an easy twenty five years either. We have had more than our share of difficult times, We could very easily have become a divorce statistic. Somehow we managed to survive and thrive in our marriage.

When my husband and I were first dating I'll let you in on a secret; my mother in law didn't like me. She was polite enough to me, but I could tell that she didn't think I was good enough for her son. Even though she never would admit that, I could tell early on that she didn't think I was right for her son.

Show your mother in law your good qualities. Do what it takes to let your mother in law see what a terrific person you really are. Your husband married you for a reason. Now you need to let your mother in law know what that reason is.Be very kind to your new mother in law and her son while you are with them. Talk respectfully to your mother in law. Offer to help make dinner and clean up the kitchen after dinner. Keep your home clean, and take care of her son. This is her baby you have ripped away from her. You are the other woman!
Be kind to your mother in law. This may be the first time she has to accept a new daughter in law into her life.Think of it this way; your new mother in law, is thinking she is losing her son. But you can help her with those fears by becoming her new relative.If you have to, kiss her butt. Compliment your mother in law. Tell  her she looks great, and that her home is beautiful. Compliment her dinner preparation. Invite her to your home for a meal you will prepare.

Ask your mother in law to share your new life. Invite her to your home. Don't make her feel left out. Go over to her home and share an engaging activity together. Go to garage and rummage sales  together.Go out with your mother in law to dinner. Go out for lunch, or go to craft shows. Do something that she likes to do, such as playing tennis, walking, throwing parties. This way, you can develop a relationship with your mother in law by doing something the two of you enjoy doing.

Treat your mother in law with the utmost of respect. Do not boss her around. Do not talk behind your mother in law's back. You have become a member of your husband's family by marrying him. This means you may have gained so many relatives that it becomes a daunting task to remember their names. Always talk nicely to your mother in law and to her relatives. Even if they are rude to you, and disrespectful, do your best to keep it together. Sometimes the best thing to say is nothing.

Your mother in law may act like a pitbull in a fighting ring. But that doesn't mean you should stoop to her level. Always take the high road, by being kind to your mother in law. While many women luck out by gaining wonderful, loving, trusting mothers in law, some don't. Handle your mother in law with care, and hopefully sooner or later she will come around to see what a great catch you are.Copyright 2012, (c).

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I have taken the high road in every respect and do all of the things you suggest, that I am able to, I have never been so unfairly treated, and have only sought understanding and kindness. I will say she publicly is cordial, even though the tension is palpable. And she has expressed to her son she is not a fan of our relationship. I love my man..that will never change, I am hurt by his unwillingness to step in and mediate or stand up for me and our relationship.
It seems I am just the odd man out..persona non grata....Where do I go from here.

P. Seeking a happy,balanced, relationship (with all)